Another birthday of yours marked by another year passing Mom. And, the blessings continued today.
I was greeted first thing this morning by a very boisterious cardinal as I left for work, I heard you. At work a very kind soul (a fellow co-worker) gave me a pin which is a heart made out of angel wings enveloping a puzzle piece (representing autism) and while she wondered at my tears I knew you were there. And finally, while attending the CPR/First Aid renewal course for work today, we reached the part of what to do if an infant is choking. I teared up but tried to hide what I was feeling, you again Mom. All of these things were my Mom today, reminders to her only child that she is with me still.
Her favorite bird was a cardinal and while she was never a loud person I imagine her soul sings to bursting now, full of joy for the freedom she now knows. Her faith sustained her, Mom was what is called a “prayer warrior.” She believed with the purest faith I have ever encountered, there was no questioning her faith it was a part of her essence. And, as part of that faith she believed wholeheartedly that angels watch over us, that each one of us is surrounded by a heavenly host. The pin I was given today, my mom was right there in this, her angels and her love that stood steadfast and strong through every storm and I have no doubt she is looking out for her grandson that she left at such a tender age before his autism diagnosis, but she knows.
And finally the infant choking part of the CPR class. When I was toddler my mother was sitting on our front porch with me letting me suck on a hard candy, when of course I sucked it in and started to choke, a parent’s worst nightmare. This was long before cell phones and long before 911 was part of our everyday lives. She was home alone with me at the time, she didn’t drive so no rushing to the ER but what my mother did to save me that day was almost step for step what you are now trained to do. She always said that God was with her that day guiding her actions and I have no other explanation for how she knew what to do as her formal education did not include any life saving training.
She was a simple woman, a stay at home mom during a time when all the women around her seemed to be striving for independence. She was older than most of her peers when she became a mother. She was simply my mom, my thorn, my staunchest supporter, my nurse, my teacher, my sounding board, my friend, my lifeblood. She lived, she died, she is missed but I still see your signs mom, I see and I know you are there.